Until a year ago, I couldn’t even tell you the name of my state governor, and he’d been in office for over two years.
For much of my life, I never concerned myself with politics. I imagined myself too pure, too wholesome, too enlightened to subject myself to such dirty dealings. That’s why I had registered as unaffiliated. Associating my name with a political party would stain my otherwise clean self-image.
My detachment from politics might sound infuriating or incomprehensible to some, but hear me out. I was one of the lucky ones, part of a middle-class family that would…
By the age of 22, I had become convinced of my unattractiveness. I was 5'7" with thinning hair and a quiet personality that often rendered me invisible. The gods who doled out attractive features apparently deemed me unworthy of their gifts.
For the rest of my third decade, I clung to that self-image. Not only did I believe it, but I also acted in a way that reinforced the belief by making myself unavailable to women.
A few brief affairs grew out of “friends first” situations, but even then, my lack of confidence and surety in my ugliness doomed our…
For most worker drones, performing your job well won’t buy you security in Corporate America. It does matter, but it’s not nearly enough. I learned that lesson back in the 90s, working for an insurance company that touted its layoff-free streak stretching back to the Great Depression.
That changed in 2001 when they cut 10% of their tech department. The layoffs almost seemed random, like someone drew names out of a hat.
I survived the great purge, though many of my peers suffered the ruthless efficiency of mass job termination. All were incredulous at the turn of events, packing little…
Ever have one of those days where you just stare at a screen, give up, and then waste away your time on mindless internet drivel?
Me too. I’ve had several days like that, sometimes strung together as if I’m reliving the same crappy movie over and over.
It’s understandable if this happens to you. The world has seen its share of chaos and nonsense this past year, and good luck trying to disconnect from it all. It reminds me of Nike’s old slogan, Just do it — easy to preach but hard to follow.
Still, we have bills to pay…
Have you ever tried to explain the basics of ideal relationship behavior to a guy? He’ll nod, tell you he gets it, and then violate every one of those principles.
It’s not because he seeks to sabotage his partner’s happiness; it’s because he interprets the rules through his own filters, bastardizing the meaning as if it passed through a lengthy game of telephone before reaching his ears.
Some guys get it and if that’s you or your partner, then read no further. But if you still struggle to understand relationship dynamics or your male partner seems clueless despite your efforts…
Once upon a time, the counting of electoral votes was sacrosanct. Even Richard Nixon respected the process. Yes, the same guy who covered up his role in the break-in of democrat headquarters during the 1972 presidential election.
Nixon may have been all-in on trying to influence the vote, but he respected the count. As Vice President in 1961, he oversaw his own defeat to John F Kennedy. Despite allegations of voter fraud, he refused to contest the election because he thought it would convey weakness to the rest of the world.
I don’t recall what Cara looked like, only what she said on our first and only date —some vague reference to my thinning hair. Time has clouded my memory, so I can’t claim her comment was intended as an insult. Perhaps she found it attractive or distinctive, and I merely misinterpreted her words.
Regardless, the effect it had on my confidence devastated me for almost a decade.
Back in the 90s, as a young twenty-something, the smallest insult, the most insignificant rejection, and even the hint of indifference would decimate my self-esteem, sending my anxiety off the charts.
If you’re a fan of the show The Twilight Zone, you might know the name, Romney Wordsworth. He was the protagonist in the episode “The Obsolete Man.”
Wordsworth, a librarian, stands trial accused of being obsolete in a world where the state has banned all books. Wordsworth argues his case passionately, but the chancellor of the proceeding declares him obsolete and calls for his execution.
In the real world, the penalty for obsolescence can result in a metaphorical death — the death of a career, financial health, and even self-esteem.
That’s where I found myself one morning in 2005, hiking…
When Terry entered the room, nobody noticed him, not even me. He struggled to get a foothold in the conversation, too quiet, too nondescript to draw attention.
When someone finally made introductions, the rest of us stared as if we were in the presence of a secret celebrity. Wow. This skinny, unassuming guy set up the event.
As the conversation advanced, Terry chose his words carefully, rarely talked about himself, but gradually attracted folks into his circle until it turned into a crowd.
Just when it seemed like his mythical trance over us waned, he’d compliment someone on their use…